An Unwelcome Quest[]
Magic 2.0 Book 3[]
Official Summary:
Ever since Martin Banks and his fellow computer geeks discovered that reality is just a computer program to be happily hacked, they’ve been jaunting back and forth through time, posing as medieval wizards and having the epic adventures that other nerds can only dream of having. But even in their wildest fantasies, they never expected to end up at the mercy of the former apprentice whom they sent to prison for gross misuse of magic and all-around evil behavior.
Who knew that the vengeful Todd would escape, then conjure a computer game packed with wolves, wenches, wastelands, and assorted harrowing hazards—and trap his hapless former friends inside it? Stripped of their magic powers, the would-be wizards must brave terrifying dangers, technical glitches, and one another’s company if they want to see medieval England—and their favorite sci-fi movies on VHS—ever again. Can our heroes survive this magical mystery torture? Or will it only lead them and their pointy hats into more peril?
Chapter Summaries[]
Prologue[]
In a time before the events in the first book, Phillip, Merlin (Jimmy), Gary, Jeff, Tyler and the other wizards from around Europe are gathered in Camelot to induct the newest wizard trainee, Todd. He has been training as Gary's apprentice for nearly a month. During the ceremonial dinner, Gary tells Phillip, Jeff and Tyler of his concerns about Todd. He tells them that Todd seems to have a sadistic nature. This makes the others slightly uncomfortable.
After dinner, at the start of his macro performance, Todd comments that he doesn't make friends easily and that other people he has known have always turned against him. He also says it would be unfortunate if his new wizard friends were to turn against him. As he begins to unveil his macro, he makes additional comments about how other wizards' macros are for show and don't really demonstrate power. His macro, on the other hand, isn't made to be flashy, but as a strong demonstration of his power. He then reveals that he has taken Kludge prisoner. Kludge is a local villager from Leadchurch. Todd has him completely incapacitated through the use to invisible force bands wrapped around various parts of his body. Todd then proceeds to give a sickening performance of making Kludge do whatever action Todd wishes through the use of a Nintendo WaveBird controller. He makes Kludge move around the dining hall and "speak" by forcing his mouth to move in sync with a recording of Todd's voice.
Phillip is disgusted by the performance, but he is uncertain of how Jimmy, the Wizard Chairman, will respond. However, after Todd makes Kludge punch Jimmy in the crotch so hard that it causes Kludge's fingers to break, the wizards decide to banish Todd.
Chapter 1[]
Todd has been banished to Florida, back in the time period from which he came. To prevent him from being able to access the computer file to hack reality, the wizards have given Todd a permanent electromagnetic field that disrupts all nearby electronic devices. He has been in solitary confinement in prison for crimes he committed prior to time traveling to Medieval England.
When Jimmy was working to get his powers restored in book 2, he had a letter delivered to Todd in order to get information about the computer file Todd originally used to hack reality. Now, Todd knows it's possible to have his powers restored. He has been working with the Treasury agents Miller and Murphy helping them understand how the file works. Every day, they talk with Todd and access the file on a computer they've set up in a nearby room. One day, while Todd is reading a game magazine and after the agents had left for the day, a security guard approaches him. The guard tells Todd that due to Todd's information, the agents have moved up in the ranks and now have their own task force with their own office headquarters and staff. The guard wants to know what Todd has been telling the agents because the guard is tired of working in the prison. The guard wants to join the agents. And in order to make the best impression on them, he wants to know what Todd knows.
Todd agrees to tell the guard what he has been telling the Treasury agents. He directs the guard to use the nearby computer to begin making changes to the file. He shouts directions from his cell since Todd cannot be near computers with his electromagnetic field. The guard makes the changes to the file as directed but doesn't see any effect. He comes back to Todd's cell to see what could have gone wrong. Todd notices the guard's digital watch is working again, which means the guard has successfully removed Todd's electromagnetic field. Since the guard doesn't think the hacking has worked, Todd convinces the guard that he must have made a mistake since Todd cannot physically see the computer to give precise instructions. Todd then convinces the guard to let him out of his cell so that he can have direct access to the computer. The guard reluctantly agrees. When Todd accesses the computer, he alters the file to shift his position and teleport behind the guard. He then knocks the guard unconscious.
Chapter 2[]
Back in Medieval England, Phillip, Martin, Tyler, Jeff, Gary and Roy are all gathered together for movie night. As it is Phillip's turn to host the gathering, he has just finished playing the movie Colossus: The Forbin Project. They discuss the nature of 1970s science fiction movies. Phillip and Martin share a conversation discussing the current status of their relationships with Brit and Gwen. Afterwards, Phillip is ready to show the next movie, Planet of the Apes. Martin, Jeff and Tyler groan because they've seen it before, and in the future from where they are from, they also know about the remake and the reboot of the movie. Phillips says they don't have to watch the Planet of the Apes, and instead they can watch The Wicker Man. Suddenly, Phillip, Tyler, Jeff and Gary disappear leaving Martin and Roy alone at Phillip's place.
Chapter 3[]
Phillip, Tyler, Jeff and Gary reappear in a strange location. It is somewhere cold, dark and outdoors. Phillip, Tyler and Jeff immediately accuse Gary of pulling a prank on them. Gary denies it. They all notice Jimmy is with them, lying flat on the ground. Since no one trusts Jimmy, they all immediately accuse him of teleporting the them for some nefarious purpose. Jimmy explains that he too was teleported unexpectedly from his bed, and that since he is on permanent probation by the wizards, he doesn’t even have the power to teleport them.
A voice in the darkness shouts for silence and a light appears. There is an old man in front of them who tells them that soon their quest will begin. The old man outlines the tasks the wizards will need to perform. First, they will need to travel through Cardhu Pass and go to the Mines of Mortlach. Then they will need to talk with the head miner Blandoch and retrieve some ore called dailuaine. And finally, they will need to take the ore to the town of Bowmore and craft it into a weapon for the final battle.
The old man tells them the quest will be dangerous, and he asks which of the wizards will lead the quest. The wizards decline the quest. Then the old man begins to repeat his question about who will lead the quest. The wizards decide they’ve had enough and talk of using their powers to teleport home. Jimmy points out that none of them have their hats and robes since they were teleported without them. Jeff explains they removed the requirement of needing a hat and robe for the shell program to recognize them as wizards, since it was too easy to take advantage otherwise. All expect for Jimmy, who still needs the hat and robe since no one trusts him.
As the old man continues to repeat his question, the wizards realize he’s not real. On closer inspection, they can see the old man is computer generated. He is waiting for a response to his question. The wizards try to use their powers to teleport away, but it doesn’t work. None of their powers work in this strange place. They are stuck.
Chapter 4[]
Martin and Roy go to talk with Gwen to explain what happened with the other wizards. Martin tells Gwen how they assumed Gary was pranking everyone but after waiting around for a while, they began to suspect something was wrong. They checked the file to look for the location of the missing wizards. But instead of the typical longitude/latitude coordinates, they found a line of code that calls out to a different program. In addition to the strange location code, the missing wizards’ settings have been altered, and they no longer have their powers nor their normal protection from being hurt.
Seeming like more than a prank, Gwen suspects that Jimmy has finally taken his revenge. Martin explains that Jimmy is also with the wizards and that he too is without his powers and protections. They are not sure if that is all part of Jimmy’s plan. Roy is tired of talking and is eager to act. Gwen and Martin decide to talk with Brit first and get her input.
Chapter 5[]
Phillip, Tyler, Jeff, Gary and Jimmy have been waiting for an hour to see what would happen. The old man has continued to repeat his question about who will lead the quest. Now that the sun has risen, they can see they are located on a cliff in some unknown mountains. The wizards decide to test the computer generated old man to see if they can force some kind of error with bad inputs. They try to answer the old man’s question with nonsensical answers. Each time, the old man pauses, and then asks them to repeat their answer. After a few attempts, Todd reveals himself through the use of a floating computer window above the wizards. He has become frustrated because the wizards are not taking his game seriously.
Todd explains how after he escaped from prison, he decided to take revenge by living well. He time traveled back to the sixties to set up a new identity for himself. Then he jumped forward to the eighties to enroll in a university. He learned more about computers and then got a job as a game developer. He had become successful and, in the meantime, has learned more about the reality file. But it wasn’t fulfilling for Todd because none of the other wizards knew that he had taken his revenge. So, he decided to contact the wizards to explain how he had taken revenge. And then he wanted to know if taking revenge the old fashioned way would be better or worse than just living well.
Todd explains how he has designed an epic quest for the wizards to perform for his own amusement. And if they don’t get started, they will eventually die of thirst on the cliff. Then Todd closes the window.
The wizards decide to take the quest and answer the old man’s question. Phillip will lead the quest. The old man then asks who will be the second, if the leader should die. Phillip responds that Jeff will be his second. The old man accepts the answer. He then repeats the objective of the quest, adding that they will take the weapon to the Chasm of Certain Doom, fulfill the prophecy and reveal the identity of the chosen one.
Tyler becomes angry with Todd’s lack of storytelling ability. Tyler tries to explain how the old man should have led with the prophecy because that would have made them more interested to hear about the quest. Todd becomes frustrated with Tyler because he’s interrupting the quest narrative to criticize the quest narrative. After a brief argument, Todd restarts the quest. The ground begins to shake, and the wizards run across a rock bridge that leads to a path down the mountain. The ground begins to break apart, and Jeff ends up falling to his death.
The others run across the bridge, with Tyler now bringing up the rear. Tyler begins to suspect that the ground only falls apart once they’ve cleared it. He tests his theory by slowing and then stopping. The ground behind him falls away, but the ground he’s standing on remains. He takes a step forward, and the ground behind him immediately falls away. He then takes him time joining the others. Once he reaches solid ground, he throws a pinecone back across the empty space where the bridge used to be. It bounces on top of the space as if the bridge were still there. Tyler complains about the lazy programming. Visibly the bridge is gone but physically, it’s still there.
Todd’s widow reappears and he explains that the shortcut programming was effective because it’s only designed to get them to run, not kill them. Except for Jeff. Todd explains that when Phillip chose his second, the quest program marked him for death. Todd tells them that the only way they will survive is if they complete the quest, otherwise they will be killed.
Todd finally tells the wizards about a dead hunting party on the path ahead, and that they should take the available supplies. They will need them because there are mountain wolves on the path to the forest.
Chapter 6[]
Gwen, Martin and Roy visit Brit the Younger at her place in Atlantis. Since Brit and Phillip are in a relationship, Gwen wants to let Brit know Phillip is in trouble. Even though it is late at night, Brit is already awake, and Brit the Elder is there are well. Since Brit the Elder is the future version of Brit the Younger, she remembered Gwen, Martin and Roy would be coming over to deliver news about Phillip. So, she took the liberty of waking Brit the Younger in preparation for their visit. However, instead of letting Gwen, Martin and Roy explain their visit to Brit the Younger, Brit the Elder proceeds to explain what’s going on based on her memories of it happening before. But Brit the Elder refuses to let the others know who is responsible, even though she knows who it is. She insists Brit the Younger experience the event for herself without future knowledge from Brit the Elder. This annoys Brit the Younger greatly.
Gwen wants to take more time and try and find a way to bring their friends back by nullifying the external program that is keeping them trapped. Roy, on the other hand, wants to use the external program to go to the same location as their friends and rescue them directly.
Brit the Elder lets slip that the group decided to go directly to the unknown location. Realizing her mistake, she explains that after trying for a day to nullify the external program, the group gave up and went with Roy’s idea of a direct rescue. Brit also accidentally mentions that they attempted to save three of the wizards even though five have been abducted.
Roy mentions that since Brit the Elder is still there to tell them what’s happening, it must mean that they survive the ordeal. Brit the Elder corrects him and says that it only means at least Brit the Younger survived.
Chapter 7[]
Eventually Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy come across the dead hunting party. As they get closer, the dead bodies fade out of existence leaving behind weapons, clothing and water. They take the supplies, put on the clothes and continue traveling down the path.
They come across a mountain wolf, which leaps for Phillip. The path down the mountain is narrow and there is a drop off on one side. They fight the wolf, being careful not to fall off the edge. Jimmy ends up kicking the wolf over the edge of the path. As they continue to hike towards the forest, there are additional wolf attacks. They dispatch each wolf by waiting for the wolf to leap and then pushing it off the cliff.
After a day of hiking, they reach a wider area of the path with some trees. They decide to camp for the night, and Jimmy builds a fire. He explains that he has become more adept at living off the land since he had to live on a bicycle for thirty years after being banished by the wizards earlier. He is careful about how he says it because he doesn’t want to appear less than deserving of his punishment. He knows the other wizards will never forget what he did to them, and he is working hard to regain their trust.
When there is another wolf attack, Tyler talks about how the wolves have a pattern to how they attack. The group suspects there is only one wolf, and that Todd is generating it over and over again to attack the group. Phillip had been using the predictability of the wolf attack pattern to push the wolves off the cliff.
After killing the wolf at the camp, they notice the wolf’s body eventually fades away and leaves behind a wrapped package called Wolf Jerky. They remark how similar it is to game design and remember that Todd is a game designer. They end up eating the wolf jerky as it’s the only source of nutrition they’ve found so far. They briefly consider whether it might be poisoned as a way of getting revenge on them but decide against it. They figure Todd wants them to suffer, and the best way to do that is by keeping them alive.
They sleep in shifts, always keeping someone on guard to kill the wolves. With the wolf timing understood, it’s relatively easy for one person to dispatch them. They soon realize if they stay in one place, the wolves will double when they respawn every couple of hours. By the time they leave camp the next morning, they have to fight off sixteen wolves. But the wolves always only attack one at a time, and always using the same timing. Even though it’s just as easy to kill sixteen wolves as it is to kill one wolf, it’s still very tiring. They keep moving toward their destination.
Chapter 8[]
Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit the Younger teleport using the external program. They are dressed in coats and hiking boats. When they teleport in, they appear over the empty space where the cliff used to be. After a brief panic, they determine that even though there doesn’t appear to be any ground, they are standing on something firm. In front of them, they can see the path that leads down the mountain.
They attempt to use their powers but with no effect. Martin tries to access the file directly through his phone but that doesn’t work either. Backpacks suddenly materialize in front of them with a note from Brit the Elder, explaining that since their powers do not work, they will need the supplies she has sent them.
A voice booms from the sky calling for silence. The old man appears and tells them about the quest on which they are about to embark. They quickly realize the old man is not real when it doesn’t respond to their questions about the other wizards who may have passed through here. When the old man asks who will lead the quest, they cannot figure out an appropriate response. It appears the old man was only programed to accept the responses of Phillip, Tyler, Jeff, Gary and Jimmy.
Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit decide to proceed without the old man’s aid. They carefully make their way to the path ahead with Martin and Roy using their staves to test the invisible ground. When they get to solid ground, they inventory the supplies provided by Brit the Elder. She has sent them energy bars, water filters, purification tablets, lighters, knives and other camping equipment. Since Brit the Elder has knowledge of what had happened to her past self, she has prepared the group well.
They decide to follow the path and try to catch up to their friends. They come across the dead hunting party. At first, they fear it is their friends, but they quickly realize otherwise. As Roy approaches, the bodies of the hunting party fade out of existence leaving behind supplies. They take some of the supplies.
As they continue to walk the path, a pair of wolves attack them. The wolves attack one at a time and Martin is able to kick the wolves off the cliff. Gwen notices how easy it was to kill the wolves. They suspect there will be more wolf attacks ahead, and Roy decides they should walk single file with himself and Martin taking the first and last spots. This offends Brit because she feels Roy is treating the women as lesser to him and Martin. Roy tries to explain that since Brit and Gwen are ladies, they should be kept in the safer position. Again, this annoys Brit because Roy does not think the women are as capable as the men, which seems especially ridiculous since the wolves are so easy to defeat.
Chapter 9[]
Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy eventually reach a forest. After another night of camping, they reach the Cursed Mines of Mortlach. The area is a large cavern with mining dwarves. The wizards can now easily tell that the miners are all computer generated. Jimmy steps forward and introduces the group and says they have come to see Blandoch, the head of the mining guild. They talk with Blandoch, who tells them the miners can no longer mine the ore because their precious canary, Oban, has been stolen by an evil king. While this is happening, Gary tries to convince the others that there’s no need for the miners to mine the ore because there is plenty of it near the entrance. But the others do not take his advice.
Blandoch tells the wizards where to find the stolen canary. It is at Castle Cragganmore. He then agrees to give the wizards the dailuaine ore in exchange for them returning Oban, the canary.
The next morning, Blandoch tells the wizards which path leads to Cragganmore. He also warns them of the hill wolves. However, the hill wolves attack using the same predictable pattern as the mountain wolves. In fact, they seem identical in every way, other than being called hill wolves.
As they pass through a river canyon, they’re attacked by a new type of wolf called a river wolf. Eventually, the path through the canyon leads them to Cragganmore. The castle is situated in the canyon between the bend of the river. The river’s current is too fast for the wizards to wade across. The obvious option is to take a heavily guarded bridge that leads to the castle, but the group thinks this is suicide.
As they contemplate giving up, Gary notices some flat edges along the cliffs near the river which he thinks is walkable. Further down the river are some rocks which he thinks may be passable. The group decides to wait for nightfall, use Gary’s secret of ninja stealth, and sneak across the rocks to the castle.
Chapter 10[]
As the group crosses the dangerous rocks, Tyler and Phillip have a chance to talk in private. Tyler tells Phillip that he still hates Jimmy for ghosting him earlier in Leadchurch. But, in the interest of cooperation to help everyone escape Todd alive, he is willing to be civil. But neither Tyler nor Phillip trust Jimmy, and they expect Jimmy would sell them out if it meant saving himself.
They make it across the rocks and are now behind the castle. The castle design makes it easy to climb, and they climb to an upper window to gain access to the interior. Inside, they find a single large room with a mirror floor. There are two levers on a pair of raised platforms. The levers can only be triggered simultaneously. When pulled, they open a hole in the floor with stairs leading down. However, the levers must remain pulled or else the opening will shut. Tyler and Gary agree to keep the levers opened so Phillip and Jimmy can travel below the castle.
While Phillip and Jimmy are walking down the stairs, they talk about the terrible things Jimmy did to everyone back in Leadchurch. Jimmy wishes there was a way to pay for his past mistakes so that everyone will trust him again. He tried to convince Phillip that it’s in Jimmy’s best interest to help everyone escape Todd, otherwise everyone back home will always assume he was the one who killed them. Phillip agrees with Jimmy’s assessment and knows there’s no way to trust Jimmy again.
They reach a chamber underground and find a puzzle blocking further progress. After solving it, they gain access to a room beyond. Inside the room, they find the king, his jester and the canary Oban. Todd obviously modeled the king on Jimmy’s likeness, while the jester is modeled on Phillip.
Jimmy and Phillip save the bird by dispatching the king and jester. While Jimmy was respectful and only knocked the jester unconscious, Phillip took the more aggressive approach and violently killed the king with his sword. Realizing how it looked, Phillip tries to explain to Jimmy that king wasn’t really Jimmy so he shouldn’t take it personally. Jimmy is noticeably annoyed with Phillip.
Chapter 11[]
Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy leave the castle with the canary. As they traverse the rocks across the river, the rocks begin to wobble and break loose. Tyler, being in the back of the group, tells the group they need to pick up the pace. The group scrambles quickly across the remaining rocks, no longer being careful as they leap from rock to rock. The rocks behind Tyler give way and are washed away by the rushing river. Then he remembers the rock bridge from the beginning of the quest. Just like the bridge, he suspects the river rocks may be visibly gone but physically still there.
Tyler tries to warn the group that they’re needlessly taking risks by quickly jumping from rock to rock. He tries to tell them it’s okay, and they should take their time and be careful. But the group is too far along, and they can’t hear him over the noise of the river.
Tyler takes his time and carefully crosses the remaining rocks. When he reaches the other side, he insults Todd’s programming again for being lazy, and that Todd is trying to get them to kill themselves without putting them in actual danger.
They hike back to the Mines of Mortlach and return the canary to Blandoch. He is happy to have his bird back. As promised, he goes to mine a bit of dailuaine ore for the wizards. He walks to the entrance of the mine and mines a rock of ore. Gary is upset because it’s the same ore he was trying to convince the group to just take for themselves before they had to walk to the castle.
Chapter 12[]
The next morning, Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy transport the dense ore using a heavy wooden sledge intended to be pulled by a draft animal. But instead, the group take turns pulling it themselves. The miners direct them to the correct path that will take them to the town of Bowmore, and then tell them to be careful of tree wolves.
Minutes after Phillip and the wizards leave the mine, Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit arrive. They talk to Blandoch, who tells them the same story about the stolen canary. At first the group is confused because they see the canary sitting beside Blandoch. They assume that he must be referring to a different canary. Eventually they realize the quest is only programmed to expect a single group and that they will need to go the castle and retrieve their own version of the canary to advance the quest.
Chapter 13[]
Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy take turns pulling the sledge through the forest. Tree wolves attack them by dropping down on them from out of the trees. When they stop to camp for the night, they are grateful for Jimmy’s expertise in finding edible plants.
The next morning, they continue hiking. A wolf drops from the trees and lands on Phillip’s cloak. Tyler and Jimmy kill the wolf while it’s still attached to the cloak. An hour later, two wolves spawn from Phillip’s cloak, which catches the group by surprise. They’re able to kill the wolves, but they fear the wolf’s spawn point is still on the cloak, which means soon, four wolves will spawn on the cloak. The group tries to convince Phillip to lose the cloak. Phillip is reluctant because he thinks the cloak makes him look good. He convinces himself that since they killed the last two wolves when they were off the cloak, the spawn point is no longer on the cloak. The rest of the group feels otherwise, and they end up convincing Phillip by telling him the cloaking isn’t a good look for Phillip. He removes the cloak and drops it to the ground.
They arrive at a cottage where they find three young women seductively performing their chores, with a fourth woman inside the cottage. When they get a closer look, they realize all of the women are modeled after Gwen, only with a different hair color for each. Phillip tries to walk reason into the guys, but it’s obvious the guys would prefer to rest at the cottage. Even though they all agree it’s probably a trap, the temptations of the Gwens are too much to resist, as they subtly imply more than just relaxation await the wizards.
Chapter 14[]
Roy, Gwen and Brit have arrived at Castle Cragganmore. Martin has walked around the canyon ledge to see if there is another way into the castle other than the direct approach across the heavily guarded bridge. Martin finds the footprints of the other wizards, but he doesn’t see any way they could have been able to cross the river.
While waiting for Martin to return, Roy assesses the situation. He inadvertently ends up offending Brit and Gwen. Roy wants to keep the women safe from danger, and he’s concerned the human guards will present more of a challenge than the wolves. Brit feels that Roy is treating them as inferiors, and she thinks the guards will be just as easy to kill as the wolves. She thinks they will use the same fighting technique as the wolves, since Todd would have programmed them the same way.
Once Martin returns, he and Roy begin to walk toward the bridge and try to formulate a plan to get past the guards. As they’re walking, Martin tries to explain to Roy why Brit and Gwen find him condescending. Roy tries to explain that he just wants to keep them safe. Eventually Martin helps Roy understand Brit and Gwen’s point of view.
As they approach the guards, Martin and Roy realize they don’t have a plan for how to deal with the guards. Martin quickly comes up with something and tells Roy to be ready to run. Roy finds this less than reassuring. Martin moves near the first group of guards and they begin to chase him. Martin and Roy run back across the bridge with the guards following behind. They approach the location where Brit and Gwen are. Gwen is ready and is hiding with Brit behind some rocks. As the guards pass, they jump out and kill the guards easily. Like the wolves, the guards only attack one at a time.
Martin makes several trips across the bridge to continue rounding up groups of guards until they’re all defeated.
After dealing with all of the guards, they enter the castle and find the single room with the two levers. They quickly figure out the purpose of the levers, and Martin and Gwen travel underground while Brit and Roy keep the levers activated.
While Martin and Gwen descend the steps, they discuss Roy’s outdated sensibilities toward women. Martin helps Gwen understand Roy’s point of view and that Roy means well. Martin convinces Gwen to continue to correct Roy’s behavior but to not hold it against him at the same time.
They eventually come to the puzzle room. Together they solve the puzzle and gain entrance into the throne room. They find the unconscious jester and a lot of blood. They fear the blood may be from one of the other wizards, not realizing it’s from the dead king who has already faded away. Martin and Gwen find and retrieve the clockwork canary.
Back on the upper area of the castle, Brit and Roy are holding the levers in the open position. They are discussing the design of the SR-71 Blackbird that Roy had a hand in designing. Brit loves engineering which surprises Roy.
When Martin and Gwen return up the stairs, Brit and Roy make a show of how difficult it’s been holding up the levers. They feign exhaustion before letting the levers go at the last minute as Martin and Gwen clear the opening. After a quick discussion about what they saw in the underground chamber, the four of them decide to get moving before the guards regenerate. Martin goes out first and finds the guards have regenerated.
Chapter 15[]
Inside the cottage, each of the Gwens hand-feed Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy. Phillip notices the computer generated Gwens are better programmed than other NPCs they’ve come across, probably due to extensive testing by Todd.
The blond-haired Gwen feeding Gary accidentally spills whipped cream on him and insists they go upstairs to the bath to clean him up. The other wizards wait downstairs and talk about how much easier it is for Phillip to resist the Gwens because he already has a girlfriend, whereas the other wizards do not.
Upstairs, Gary tries in vain to resist the seductions of Blond Gwen as she has him remove his clothing for his bath. As he begins to kiss her, Blond Gwen begins to change. Gary is insistent he can make it work until Blond Gwen has become full zombie. She snarls and comments how she will make him suffer many torments. But Gary notices that while Zombie Gwen follows him directly, she doesn’t actually invade his personal space. Like Todd’s other “dangers”, this one is made to scare, not to kill. He takes his time putting his clothes back on before he goes downstairs to warn the other guys.
Downstairs, Gary finds the other Gwens have all gone full zombie. The Zombie Gwens also keep a respectful distance from the wizards. The décor of the cottage has become rotten and putrid. The wizards calmly discuss their options. They can stay the night, but that doesn’t seem appealing anymore with the rotten state of the cottage and with the Gwens constantly making threats. They also discuss tying the Gwens to the sledge and having them pull it, since the Gwens will follow the wizards wherever they go.
At this point, Todd’s computer window appears. He is frustrated with the wizards because they are not properly scared of the zombie Gwens, and the wizards seem intent on ruining his quest. The wizards tell Todd they know his quest isn’t made to be dangerous, and as such, there’s no reason to take it seriously. Todd agrees and tells them he is making changes so that future dangers are more deadly. Todd then sets fire to the cottage forcing the wizards to flee.
Chaper 16[]
Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit have fought their way through the soldiers and hiked back to the mines. They return the bird to Blandoch, who is very happy to have it back. He proceeds to mine the same ore he gave to the other wizards. The quest glitches and the ore ends up having no visible properties. It’s still very heavy though. Brit realizes the invisible ore will be difficult to carry, so she devises a way to cover it to make it visible.
Chapter 17[]
Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy hike through the forest and arrive at the town of Bowmore. They find the blacksmith, Inchgower. After showing him the ore, Inchgower agrees to make the weapon. But first, he needs the group to collect a lot of bricks from a nearby clay pit.
Using some wheelbarrows, they make multiple trips to haul bricks back to the blacksmith’s shop. After stacking the final bricks, Inchgower tells them he will need a lot of clay. Again, the wizards go out to the clay pit. They collect the clay and bring it back to the blacksmith. After they finish dumping the clay into a pile, Inchgower tells them he needs the bricks moved from outside the shop to inside the shop. He instructs them to stack the bricks in a specific way to make a furnace. Afterwards, he instructs them to collect charcoal for the furnace.
After collecting the charcoal, Inchgower has them finish packing the clay into the walls of the furnace. He then tells them to get some sleep because the next morning they will battle a fearsome beast called Strathisla. The blacksmith needs one of its bones to complete the weapon.
Chapter 18[]
The next morning, Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy line up in the road waiting to battle the beast. When an old lady NPC runs across the road, a patch in the road opens up and something quickly pulls her into the hole before it closes.
The hole reopens dramatically, and a large 10-foot tall spider emerges. Tyler immediately criticizes Todd for using something as cliché as a giant spider. Todd freezes the program to explain how using a trap-door spider is unique because it’s never been done before.
Tyler then insults Todd’s intelligence because they were supposed to kill the beast in order to get a bone for the blacksmith. But spiders don’t have bones. After a discussion about spiders, venom and octopuses, Todd tells Tyler that he is intitled to his opinion, but he still has to fight the giant spider. Todd resumes the program and the giant spider attacks the wizards.
They make a quick battle plan to attack the leg joints and eyes. However, the giant spider releases thousands of tiny spiders to attack them. They are quickly overwhelmed and must retreat. Eventually, each of the wizards are surrounded by the tiny spiders. But just like the wolves, the spiders follow a specific 3-second timing when attacking, and they only attack one at a time. Also, like the Zombie Gwens, the non-attacking spiders keep a respectful distance away from their target.
While fighting the tiny spiders, Tyler is webbed by the giant spider Strathisla. As the giant spider is moving in for the kill, Jimmy comes to his rescue by getting the spider to focus on Jimmy instead. Phillip calls for Jimmy to bring the spider closer so they can work together to bring the spider down. He, Jimmy and Gary attack the giant spider’s legs.
Eventually, they’re able to cut off half of Strathisla’s legs, leaving it immobile. Gary runs off to rescue Tyler, while Phillip and Jimmy work together to take out Strathisla’s eyes. Once it’s dead, the tiny spiders stop moving.
Gary tells the group that it’s likely the giant spider isn’t completely dead yet. He expects it will come back to life like a cliché horror movie. Phillip and Jimmy make a show of turning their backs to the spider and pronouncing it dead. As soon as they do, the giant spider and its tiny spider minions spring back to life. But without most of its legs, Strathisla is no longer a danger. Jimmy grabs his sword and buries it deep into Strathisla’s left eye, finishing it for good. All of the tiny spiders fade away. When the giant spider fades away, it leaves behind a giant spider skeleton, with one of its bones glowing.
The wizards remove the glowing bone and bring it to the blacksmith.
The next morning, Inchgower has the wizards break up the dailuaine ore into smaller chunks. Using the furnace, the blacksmith begins to melt down the ore. He tells the wizards they will need to pump the bellows for 6 hours to keep the fire hot enough to complete the process.
Chapter 19[]
Without the use of the sledge, Brit and Gwen use Martin’s and Roy’s staves and robes to create a carrier for the dailuaine ore. Roy compliments the women on their ingenuity and craftsmanship.
As they’re hiking the next day, Brit discusses she feels they are not going to catch up to their friends and may even be failing behind. As long as both groups continue doing the quests, they won’t catch up. And since their group has to fight off double the wolves as the first group, it may be taking them longer.
Soon Martin finds Phillip’s discarded cloak, not knowing it belonged to Phillip. Martin takes the cloak, thinking it may be a powerful quest item since it has been placed in the middle of their quest and is guarded by four wolves. Later, as they’re hiking, eight wolves spawn from it, and they end up leaving it behind.
Chapter 20[]
While Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy pump the billows, they begin talking about what Jimmy did to them in Leadchurch. Jimmy cannot apologize enough for ghosting Tyler, because Tyler will never forgive. They discuss the punishment Jimmy received and whether it was enough to pay for his crimes. Eventually they conclude they will never trust Jimmy for as long as he lives because there’s always the possibility that he will betray them again. Only when he is dead and gone, and having never betrayed the group, will they be able to look back and say, “He was trustworthy after all.”
After pumping the billows, Inchgower returns to pour the molten dailuaine into a mold. When the metal is done cooling, Inchgower reveals they’ve been making an anvil, not a weapon as originally thought. The blacksmith tells them dailuaine is too dense to be used as a weapon. Instead, it’s used to form Lagavulin steel into weapons. It’s the only metal hard enough to do so.
Inchgower tells the wizards to get some sleep, because tomorrow they will begin forging the weapon.
Chapter 21[]
Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit eventually reach the burned cottage. It’s damaged but not destroyed. They find the three Gwens performing their chores outside. The real Gwen becomes angry that Todd would use her likeness in such a way. The fake Gwens run through their routine of trying to convince the travelers to stay the night, but the group decides to keep hiking.
Chapter 22[]
Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy finish hammering the glowing steel into a twelve-foot long blade. As they comment on the ridiculous size of the blade and how impossible it will be to use it, Inchgower takes the blade and forms it into a circle with a twist on one end. Due to some quick reprogramming by Todd, to complete the weapon, the wizards must pee on the glowing steel to quench it.
The steam from the quenching causes the wizards to gag and cough. Todd makes a quick appearance via computer window to mock the wizards before disappearing again. Inchgower presents the finished weapon, the Möbius Blade. It has no handle, and it’s so deadly, it can cut through anything. Inchgower tells them to take the blade to the Chasm of Certain Doom to complete the quest.
The wizards don’t have an easy way to transport the blade because it cuts through everything they wrap around it. They decide to wrap their hands with rags and hold the blade by resting it in their palms, which each wizard holding a portion of the blade.
The next morning, they hike out of the town and begin their journey to the desert.
Chapter 23[]
Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit arrive at the town of Bowmore. They carry the ore to the blacksmith. Inchgower tells them he will need materials in order to create the weapon for them. The group talks about having to perform tasks at each stop in the quest, but they skipped the last stop with the Gwens. They guess that they don’t really need to do the quests to move on, and that they could catch up easier by skipping them. They decide to take the risk and skip Inchgower’s quest.
Chapter 24[]
Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy hike through the desert, which is more of a wasteland. They are moving slowly due to carrying the Möbius Blade. As they are walking, they come across a dirt elemental. The wizards put the Möbius Blade on the ground and run.
Phillip trips, and the elemental crashes into him and sends him flying. Phillip breaks his arm when he accidentally cuts off the elemental’s hand, but the elemental reforms its own hand by reabsorbing the fallen dirt.
Before the dirt elemental can finish Phillip, Gary comes to his rescue by cutting of its arm with his sword. It reforms and begins chasing Gary. He leads it to Jimmy and Tyler who cut off its legs. Once it reforms again, Gary leads the elemental to a large water puddle. Once in the puddle, the elemental becomes stuck as it turns into mud. The mud is too heavy for it to form properly. They decide to get moving before the elemental has time to reform.
Chapter 25[]
Martin, Roy, Brit and Gwen are riding in a modified cart, fitted with a handbrake on the rear axle and a steering system in the front. They built the cart while they were in the town. As they were building the cart, Brit and Gwen had a conversation about working well together with the men. Brit thinks it may have been a mistake to isolate Atlantis from men. At the time, it seemed like a good idea because of how women had been treated throughout history. But now, Brit thinks it may have been better to integrate the two societies so that the women can show their worth and interact with the men as equals.
They continue to ride in the cart, moving quickly. They think they have a good chance to catch up with their friends.
Chapter 26[]
With Phillip's broken arm, he is no longer helping to carry the Möbius Blade. Instead, he leads the group as they continue to hike through the desert. Soon, they arrive at the Chasm of Certain Doom.
Chapter 27[]
Eventually, the hills end, and Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit are forced to walk. They’re happy to see the footprints of their friends and begin to follow them. They’re concerned that there’s only four sets of footprints, even though five wizards were abducted. They assume one of the wizards has been hurt, and the other four are carrying him.
The footprints lead them to a dirt mound, which forms into an elemental and begins chasing them. They’re able to subdue the creature by leading it into a bog. However, they know it’s only a matter of time before the creature will be able to reform itself.
They come up with a plan to use the elemental to push the cart while they ride in it. It’s a dangerous plan, and Gwen objects. But she is outvoted.
Roy, Gwen and Brit wait in the newly modified cart. It has been refitted with a large wooden wall in the back to absorb the impact of the elemental.
Martin acts as bait and gets the elemental to begin chasing him as soon as it can reform. He leads the elemental toward the cart. As it gets close, Martin leaps into the cart, and the elemental slams it forward. Martin almost falls out, but he is able to secure himself as the elemental continues to run forward, bumping the cart along.
Chapter 28[]
When Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy arrive at the Chasm of Certain Doom, they find a marked path, paved with bones. The chasm is deep, and at the bottom is a river of lava. Tyler comments that a river of lava wouldn’t cut a chasm. If anything, it would add rock.
The path bends over the chasm and leads downward to the bottom. The path is so narrow, it creates a challenge for the guys to carry the Möbius Blade. They consider throwing the blade over the chasm and retrieving it when they get to the bottom, but they fear it will damage the blade beyond usability. Instead, they position a person in front and back, and a third person in the middle of the blade.
Wolves spawn in to attack but the path is so narrow, the wolves don’t spawn completely on it. They end up falling into the canyon below.
It’s hours before they finally reach the bottom of the path, and it’s dark. They decide to camp for the night. They take turns fighting off wolves while the others sleep. Then they hear a crashing sound which wakes them all up.
Chapter 29[]
Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit continue riding across the desert while being pushed by the elemental. It’s nighttime as they’re riding, and Brit sees the canyon up ahead. But it’s almost too late. She turns the cart to run parallel along the canyon. The elemental continues to push them along.
They need to lose the elemental. They make a spiral turn, getting tighter as they turn. The elemental doesn’t turn as well, and it loses contact with the cart. When they pull out of the turn, they’re headed straight for the canyon edge. Gwen throws the emergency brake which stops the cart from going over the edge. They jump out as the elemental reacquires its target and crashes the cart over the canyon.
Chapter 30[]
The elemental has landed in the lava river at the bottom of the canyon. Phillip, Tyler, Gary and Jimmy assume the elemental reformed, chased them into the canyon and then fell it its death.
No longer tired, they continue hiking and cross the lava river using a series of rocky islands. Once on the other side, they hike to the source of the lava. Nearby, they find a patch of rock where the sunlight shines down like a natural spotlight. When they approach, a voice calls out and beacons them to complete the quest and bring the Möbius Blade into the light.
Knowing it’s likely a trap, they stand just outside the circle of light and toss the blade into it. They wait to see what happens. Then the ground underneath them opens, and they fall into the hole.
Chapter 31[]
The wizards fall into a bowl-shaped room. Connected to the bowl-shaped room, is the room from which Todd has been monitoring the wizards’ progress throughout the quest. Up above, they can see the underside of the canyon ground from where they fell.
Todd teleports into the center of the bowl. He tells them that he has been monitoring them constantly, listening in on every conversation and reading handwritten notes they’ve been passing around. Nothing has escaped his notice.
He asks them for the Möbius Blade, knowing they left it behind in the shaft of light. He taps on his tablet, and the blade cuts through the ceiling and hovers in the center of the room. He freezes the wizards in place using his force bands macro. He rearranges the wizards and lines them up around the bowl. Then he programs the Möbius Blade to start swing back and forth, as if it were on a giant pendulum.
Todd explains the nature of the pendulum. As it swings back and forth, over time, it will gradually shift position due to the spin of the Earth. Eventually, it will cut through each wizard, killing them. He asks if the wizards want to beg for mercy before they die.
Phillip mentions there’s still too much time before the Möbius Blade will swing around and kill them. Since they still have at least fifteen hours, they will wait before they start begging. After hearing this, Todd repositions the Möbius Blade so that on its next swing, it cuts into Gary, slicing off his leg.
Not wanting Gary to bleed to death before the blade can finish killing him, Todd adjusts the force band around his upper leg to cut off the blood flow. After the wizards begin to threaten and insult him, he forces their mouths closed and begins monologuing.
He becomes irritated when he notices his captives aren’t looking at him during his monologue, and he must periodically stop and get their attention. Then, he gets hit in the back of the head by one of Martin’s boot.
Chapter 32[]
The story backs up a bit to show how Martin, Roy, Gwen and Brit got into Todd’s room. After making their way down the canyon path, they see their friends throw the Möbius Blade into the light. Then they see the ground open up and swallow them. They quickly cross the rocks over the lava river and see the Möbius Blade move down into the ground.
Once they get to where their friends were standing earlier, they see the large hole that leads into the bowl-shaped room. They look into the hole and see Todd and their captured friends. They notice Gary has lost one of his lower legs. They quickly come up with a plan to drop into the room behind Todd. While Martin distracts him, Brit will sneak around the side to access Todd’s computer.
They enter the room and Martin throws his boot at the back of Todd’s head. Todd spins around, leaving his computer accessible to Brit. Martin and Todd start talking about why Todd has captured the wizards and what he’s planning to do with them. Todd quickly figures out that Martin and the others must have followed their friends into the quest. But since he’s been so focused on Phillip’s group, he never thought to look back to see if anyone was following them.
Todd realizes he cannot apply the force bands to Martin, Roy and Gwen because the bands have to be fitted perfectly to each person, and it would take too long to measure. Todd then tells them about how he killed Jeff on the cliffs. He uses his tablet to force his captive prisoners to fight Martin, Roy and Gwen. Todd uses his fighting AI to control Tyler, Gary and Jimmy, but he takes direct control of Phillip.
As they’re fighting, Brit finally gets access to Todd’s computer and tries to find a way to release the wizards and restore everyone’s powers. But only has access to Jimmy’s screen. She can’t figure out how to switch to the other prisoners. She doesn’t trust Jimmy, but she feels that she doesn’t have a choice. Hoping for the best, she resets Jimmy’s settings.
Jimmy feels the force bands release. Brit reveals herself and tells him that his powers are back. Tyler cries out in despair, and Phillip tells Jimmy, "Don't screw us.". Jimmy immediately teleports out.
Chapter 33[]
Todd immediately teleports to his computer to stop Brit from accessing anything else. Phillip, Tyler and Gary are still fighting the other wizards. Todd yells at Brit to stop messing with his computer. He notices the power cord and pulls it, shutting it down. Todd comes up behind Brit to hit her with his tablet but freezes mid-swing. Also, the fighting has stopped.
Brit asks what happened, and they hear Jimmy’s voice saying he’s saved them. Jimmy enters the room. It’s clear he has cleaned himself up, so it’s been some time since his extraction, from his perspective.
Jimmy tells Todd about the modified force band macro holding him, and how it programmatically adapts itself to the target. Jimmy then teleports Gary to a doctor in Atlantis. He tells the group he talked with Brit the Elder to plan this rescue.
Martin asks Jimmy about the spell he used to escape Todd, since Jimmy doesn’t have access to any teleportation spells while on probation. Jimmy admits that he had a secret shell program he used when he pretended to give up his powers to the wizards.
Jimmy puts his hand on Todd, and they both teleport away. A minute later, they reappear. Jimmy is wearing different clothes, and Todd is completely disheveled. Jimmy explains that he took Todd to his penthouse and interrogated him. He was able to get the password to Todd’s hard drive where he has details of how he did everything, and more importantly, the exact telemetry of how, when and where Jeff died. They should be able to use the information to save Jeff.
The group briefly discusses what they’re going to do with Todd, until Jimmy reminds them that Todd is his prisoner, so he gets to decide what to do with him. Jimmy asks Todd what his punishment should be. Todd says it doesn’t matter since he will always find a way back, and when he does, they’re all dead. Jimmy places a hand on Todd’s shoulder and says, “Execution: Todd”, and Todd is gone.
Everyone is horrified at what Jimmy has done. Jimmy says that someone had to do it, and it was better if it was him. Jimmy knows he is a pariah, and he tells the group that he has decided to execute himself as it will be the only way the group will ever realize he is trustworthy.
No one believes him. Jimmy admits they won’t ever believe he really killed himself. Even if they were to check the file and see that he’s gone, they will always suspect he has tricked them somehow.
Then Jimmy executes himself using his macro. A bolt of lighting strikes Jimmy, and he disappears leaving behind a tombstone that reads, “James Sadler: He never betrayed us again.”
Chapter 34[]
Back in Reno, Jimmy reappears in his condo penthouse. Todd is there waiting for him. Jimmy tells Todd he has learned that some mistakes can never be forgiven. He can try to make it right, but when it becomes obvious he will never succeed, he should drop it and get on with his life. Jimmy feels guilty for trying to kill Phillip, Martin, and the other wizards. Now, he feels he should protect them from being killed to make up for it.
Jimmy doesn’t know what to do with Todd. He can either kill him quickly and painlessly, or he can reinstate the magnetic field and send him back to prison. He wants to be merciful and asks Todd what he should do.
Todd says he doesn’t want to go back to prison. Jimmy places his hand to Todd’s head and says, “Execute: Todd disposition macro two.” Todd disappears.
Jimmy sits down at his computer and gets on with his life.
Chapter 35[]
Jeff is falling to his death. Time slows to a crawl, and he hears Roy’s voice. Roy tells him to calm down because they’re going to save him. There’s a flash of light and Jeff finds himself back at Leadchurch, where his friends are waiting for him.
They tell Jeff how they saved him without letting Todd know about it. They replaced him with a computer generated body just before he hit the bottom of the cliff.
It’s been a month since they escaped from Todd since it took a while to plan Jeff’s rescue. In the meantime, Gwen has moved in with Martin, and Gary has had a robotic foot installed.
They also tell Jeff that Jimmy is dead, even though Phillip doesn’t believe it. They discuss how even if Jimmy isn’t dead, he’s at least altered the file so that he appears to be dead. So, they would never be able to find him anyway. If he really is alive, they have no choice but to let him live his life.
When Phillip mentions that whatever happened to Jimmy, he is confident he will never see Jimmy again, Brit the Elder says, “Yes. You are totally confident of that, right now.” Phillip thinks about what she said, and then she adds, “And now, you’re less confident.”
Additional Notes:
An inconsistancy of note, in chapter 12 it says "the miners offered the use of their sledge" to Philip and his group, yet in chapter 19 it says "nobody had ever offered Philip's party the use of the sledge, they just saw it and chose to use it" when Brit's group got to that point.